Miscalculated Errors.

Mmm hmm I am aware that this is my second post today, that's just how I do this blogging thing. It all comes out at once like a variety of other things that I will not mention. Not that I have all those other things... in fact I'm not sure I know what they all are.

Anyway, I was thinking about how sometimes, when things go wrong it can be quite funny but most of the time just completely humiliating and likely to scar your self esteem for life. I was thinking about a series of unfortunate events [I quote book names] that have occured over my lifetime that leave me full of regret and distress but more importantly a willingness to laugh at my own stupidity.

1. Don't you hate it when you say the wrong thing to the wrong person. Usually this situation stems from a lack of tact [something which I only acquired a few years ago and therefore I found myself in this situation frequently in primary school] or because you don't realise that someone is standing right behind you when you say something extremely stupid. You know what I mean, don't you? I'm pretty sure it happens to everyone but in fact it has only happened to me once and my amazingly witty and well thought out comeback was "Oh hello, I didn't know you were there."

2. Getting locked in the most inconvenient places. For me, this is often a toilet. And yes this has happened in a variety of places but the one that stands out the most is when I got locked in my friend's toilet and her older brothers had to kick the door open. What really made it awkward was the fact that all the rest of her family were outside the door waiting for me.

3. Poo. Yes, the horrible wiffy stuff. Usually it only happens when I don't watch where I walk and mean dog owners leave the mess all over the street. [I have developed the theory that they do it on purpose]. But only once have I been pooped on by a bird. And it was at a public place, in fact, it happened at a train station about two minutes before the extremely busy train I had to get on turned up. Due to my strangely unexpected quick thinking skills I managed to get it all out and vowed to myself that I would never stand right under the edge of a roof again.

4. Falling over. I have a fear of falling over backwards as I did once in the playground and it severely hurt my back but at the same time it was quite funny. Anyway, I can probably be labelled as clumsy so I tend to trip over invisible objects quite a lot. Although everyone else tends to look concerned when I fall on my backside, I usually just laugh it off.

5. Waving at people who aren't waving at you. Yes, there is nothing quite like seeing someone waving at you across a crowded room and waving back only to realise that they are waving at someone behind you.

Hmm so I should try and finish this off with some inspiring advice about how not to find yourself in these situations but the truth is that they happen. Oh well, just remember to look where you walk and don't use public toilets.